I love to drive and listen to music. Recently as I was heading to Virginia’s Northern Neck, during a random shuffle of songs, a new recording of “Both Sides Now” by Joni Mitchell caught me. I heard it differently than before. I had a deep somatic response as I listened to the words.Her voice, so deep now with age, and so full of soul, sang the words in such a way that I felt she was weighing each word internally as she sang. And I was right there with her.
As the women’s retreat was the following week, and the topic was “Meeting Life As It Is,” I found that the lyrics really spoke to that topic. Funny, isn’t it, how you can hear something so differently? I’d listened to that song thousands of times before.
But this time, I heard…”I really don’t know life at all…” “I really don’t know love at all…” – and I felt such resonance with those words, and with the words, “It’s life’s illusions I recall…” “It’s love’s illusions I recall…” I spent the weekend thinking about all the illusions I carried, how things turned out, how I have no control over what happens, how my illusions sometimes kept me buoyant, and how they sometimes can put me into despair.
So I am more conscious of meeting my life right where it is. Today. And with thanks to Joni Mitchell. Time to listen to more of my old music to see what I can learn.